Speak Life

"To be human is to be oriented toward a goal." (James K.A. Smith, Calvin College Philosophy Professor) What is it that I, Jennifer Baham, long for in my inner being? What do my longings, desires, and loves uncover about my idea of flourishing or "the good life"? And when I look at the habits in my life, what love-shaping practices or liturgies do I see? For, as Professor Smith shared at the CSI Worldview Summit (August 2-4, 2016), those practices or habits in my life do something to me even as I live them out.

What would a "liturgical audit" of my teaching or my Christian school reveal?  Professor Smith posed that it is not possible to THINK our way out of an undesirable cultural liturgy. But rather, by consciously and consistently choosing practices or habits aimed first at God and His Kingdom, transformation happens at the heart level. I orient what I love to God's design and will by choosing habits that do something to me even as I live them out. "Practices invite me into God's story in a repetitive motion over time." (James K.A. Smith) This recalibrating of my loves, through repetitive practices, reforms my heart and my habits of desire. Practices change what I live for, or think I want to live for. 

As a Christian school, we have a unique opportunity, indeed a unique calling, to reorient our hearts and those of our students toward the GOOD LIFE as relationship with God and obedience to His call. If a student graduates with a heart posture that sees flourishing as relationship with God and obedience to His call, I believe we are on the path to which God has called us in Christian education. Growing together in practices which move toward redemption and restoration of God's good creation brings God's kingdom here on earth.

This year our SJCS community will consider what it means to SPEAK LIFE. It is our prayer that as we uncover this theme, we will be reorienting the heart of our community toward God and His kingdom. Together we will discover what God's word has to say about the words we choose or don't choose, the heart posture from which our words flow, and the power of our words. What will it mean to SPEAK TRUTH on the playground or in a homework assignment? What will it look like to SPEAK HOPE given the history of our country and world? Can I SPEAK SHALOM in a hurting relationship? What does it mean to SPEAK RECONCILIATION as we uncover the racial tensions that continue to surface? Do I SPEAK WISDOM when I prepare students for an assessment and then unfold the results of that assessment? When I speak to a coworker, student or parent, do I SPEAK LIVING WATER that leaves the dry and thirsty souls in my school community less parched than they came? Will I SPEAK GOD'S PRAISES as an outflow of my heart, even in the hurting places? I believe that prayer, Bible study, confession, welcoming the friend and the stranger, and taming the tongue will be some of the powerful habits that will shape us and orient us.

We have an overwhelming call, yet we move forward humbly knowing that indeed it is GOD'S WORK!! He goes before us. His Spirit speaks and intercedes and teaches and guides. As my principal, Dave Intlekofer, pointed out at the conference, the more we learn the vocabulary of integrating faith into all we do, the more opportunities the Spirit reveals to us, and the more we can move forward in our own particular trust and obey.

Breath of Life in Chaos

View of the Sea of Galilee from Capernaum

"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. And God said, 'Let there be light.', and there was light." Genesis 1:1-3

"The LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being." Genesis 2:7

"The voice of the LORD is over the waters; the God of glory thunders, the LORD thunders over the mighty waters. The voice of the LORD is powerful; the voice of the LORD is majestic. The voice of the LORD breaks the cedars; the LORD breaks in pieces the cedars of Lebanon. The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace." Psalm 29:3-5, 11

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it." John 1:1-5

"On the evening of that first day of the week, when the disciples were together with the doors locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, 'Peace be with you!' After he said this, he showed them his hands and side. The disciples were overjoyed when they saw the Lord. And again Jesus said, 'Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.' And with that he breathed on them and said, 'Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone his sins, they are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.'" John 20:19-23

As a music teacher of over 20 years, breath is a regular topic of conversation and training. Teaching a student to breath well and use breath effectively affects how well my students can sing or play an instrument. A few years ago I started talking with the Grade 5 students about the connection between the breath of life described in Genesis, and the power we have to use our own voices in life-giving ways. 

And then last week I read John 20:19-23 and I can't stop reading it. I had never noticed before that Jesus breathed on his disciples, his talumidim. Back up to John 20:19. A few days prior the disciples watched as their Rabbi hung on the cross, seemingly dead and defeated. They faced the heart-wrenching reality that in Jesus' time of greatest suffering, they had chosen safety over loyalty. And now they were locked up together in a room, fear-filled and confused. 

Back up even further to Genesis 1:1. In ancient history, water represented chaos. A strong-held belief taught that evil resided in bodies of water. "The Spirit of God was hovering over the [chaos]." And then God says, "Let there be light." Later in Genesis 2 the author describes God's creation of mankind in this way: "God breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being."

Fast forward to Jesus' time on earth. John opens his poetic gospel connecting Jesus, God with us, to the very God who breathed life into Adam at creation. Again, there is confusion in the world. And Jesus, God Himself, comes to earth in the midst of the confusion and offers life-giving light. (John 8:12)

As the disciples sat locked in a room just days after Jesus' crucifixion, Jesus "breaks the cedars" (Psalm 29), if you will, by entering the locked room and standing among the very men who betrayed him. And, according to John, the first words to come out of the voice of God's Son, are "Peace be with you." Peace in the storm. Order in the chaos. God's grace to a group of men who loved the LORD, but were lost in fear and confusion. And after speaking peace a second time, Jesus breathes on them and gives them the Holy Spirit. The God whose breath transformed Adam into a living being, transformed Jesus' followers with the power and presence of the Holy Spirit. [By the way, I also noticed for the first time that Jesus breathed the Holy Spirit to the disciples in that room BEFORE Pentecost.]

I find it striking that in the same locked room where Jesus first appears to his talmidim, he speaks not only of peace but also of forgiveness. 

I am challenged by these texts in many ways, some yet to be uncovered. My soul is encouraged at the reminder that God is bigger than my fear and confusion, and that He steps into our world to offer peace in the midst of it. My heart is humbled as I consider relationships where I have not allowed God's breath of life to guide my thoughts, actions, or words. I feel challenged to understand more of God and His presence in my life, and to live a life that reflects God's breath of life in me. As I grow in faith [relationship with God], will forgiveness be a mark of my life as God's disciple? Will I trust my Rabbi even while I still feel afraid or confused? God speaks to His beloved in the chaos of our hearts and lives, and offers peace--indeed the very breath of life--to us.

"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, correcting, rebuking, and training in righteousness." 2 Timothy 2:16

Shalom

Picture taken on June 20, 2015 in a cave at the Tent of Nations

Shalom. Peace. Often when we think of shalom, or peace, we think of the absence of war or conflict. But as Dhaod pointed out on my recent visit to the Tent of Nations, "Shalom is not the absence of conflict but the presence of righteousness."

In the context of the Middle East, the shalom principle means standing for justice and righteousness in the face of daily conflict. Shalom means standing for what is just. Shalom means making decisions as a piece of a mosaic, knowing that over time, small changes (color tiles) will turn change the picture (mosaic).

Although we do not live in the political climate of the Middle East, and do not have the threat of war at our doorstep, the shalom principle applies to our lives. If in my relationships I seek "the presence of righteousness" rather than peace as we think of it, I believe God has room to bring His kingdom. What does it mean to live "the presence of righteousness" in my marriage? parenting? friendships? career?

Since considering the shalom principle in my relationships, I have seen my heart shift. I see God moving more freely in my heart and mind as I focus less on the absence of conflict, and focus more on the presence of righteousness. Shalom. God's kingdom here on earth.

The LORD is my Gardener

My co-worker, Mrs. Coetsee, recently led her students through a study of the Psalms. This study came at a poignant time in our SJCS history as we were losing our beloved Jack Veenstra. The LORD was Jack's Shepherd. Psalm 23 fueled the students' prayers for Jack and his family, and brought comfort to many of us in our grief.

God speaks to us through the Bible. Even though the Psalms are man's prayers to God, God still speaks His truth to us through the text. The Psalms give words to emotions such as anger, despair, sadness, and joy. The Psalms teach us to pray. Through the Psalms we practice praise, honesty before God, and intimate relationship with Him.

On Monday at faculty devotions, Mrs. Coetsee read the comforting words of David's 23rd psalm. She then shared student work from her Psalms unit. We read some of the personalized versions of Psalm 23 from a middle school point of view. If I were to write a "Psalm 23 Prayer", it might read something like this:

The LORD is my gardener.

I can trust Him to tend the gardens of my heart and soul.

When I am well nourished in His Presence and His Word, I flourish

With green leaves,

Beautiful flowers,

Abundant fruit,

And radiant colors.

When the soil of my heart hardens and dries up,

There is no room for me to hear the still small voice of His Spirit. 

Bitterness, faithless fears, lack of forgiveness, self-will and criticism

Crowd out the abundance

God prepares for me.

When weeds threat to take over,

His Spirit walks with me in the garden as I

Surrender once again to the more beautiful design God has for me.

Cultivate my heart in such a way that

Compassion, kindness, and courage grow abundantly.

Plant seeds of hope, faith, peace and joy.

Water my soul with Your Presence, Your Truth, and Your Love.

I choose to put my life in Your hands, for it is then that I truly live.

Take my fears, my hurts, my questions, and my failures.

Take my joys, my dreams, and my gifting.

Creator God, resurrect my broken heart

Into a colorful bouquet of

Truth-filled thoughts, grace-filled words and fragrant deeds.

May Your kingdom come, and Your will be done,

On earth as it is in heaven.

The Power of Shared Experience

The young people in this picture have shared over 2,000 SJCS recesses together, a week at 5th grade science camp, the spiritual retreat, four years of band, a well-executed play called "The Westing Games", faith doubts about our indescribable God and what it means to be His child... The students in this picture share a rich history.

I believe that we were created to live in community. Our Triune God, Father-Son-Holy Spirit, exists communally. As image-bearers, we, too, thrive when we walk life together on this journey.

Truly the most powerful influences on my walk with God have happened through shared experience. A few years ago my friend took me mountain-biking on a trail off the Monterey coast. This was my first mountain biking experience, and I came away with a new understanding of Jesus' offer that we can "have life and have it to the full." Letting go of my own fears and insecurities, with mud flying everywhere and a body that knew I had not been biking in years, I found liberating freedom and great joy.

Another unexpected gift from God came as He prompted me to approach someone to mentor me. I was "all thumbs" asking, inviting, this sister in Christ to journey with me. The shared experiences of weeping together, laughing together, and praying together cannot be measured. Through this friendship God continues to reveal Himself to me. I am learning to open my heart to God in exciting and even scary ways. C.S. Lewis says about Aslan in The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, "Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I tell you."

The picture above captures in time five of our current 8th grade students when they were in 4th grade. Over the past four years God moved in and through these kids and their families. One of the most powerful factors in growing as people happens during shared experiences. Who are you sharing life with these days? How are you meeting in your basic need "to know and be known?" As we celebrate this Christmas season together, let us experience anew Immanuel, God with us.

The Breath of Life

"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters... Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.' So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." Genesis 1:1, 26-27

God breathed the breath of life, and creation came to be. I believe the human voice reflects our Creator God. As image-bearers of God, we, too, can breathe the breath of life through our voices. I often think that hearing voices sing is one of the most life-giving experiences we are granted on this earth. Think about what it is like to hear our kids sing in worship. Listen to this arrangement of Barber's Adagio for Strings arranged for a cappella voices with your eyes closed and your heart open. Think back to the last time the worship band dropped out, leaving only voices to sing with God's very breath of life. There is something life-giving in our voices. 

Our voices give life every time they laugh with joy, utter an encouraging word, weep with a friend, or pray over another. May our voices give life to the people we journey with today.

The Script

Last week the SJCS staff gathered for two days. We considered the Bible in light of N.T. Wright's belief that the most central truth to the Bible is God's faithfulness. We examined SJCS' most important characteristics. And we renewed our commitment to intentional Christian teaching.

In the midst of the many people, the many words, the myriad of emotions over those two days, God penetrated my heart with a truth I had been teaching in 8 Bible the past two weeks: I am God's Beloved. Henri Nouwen gives a compelling sermon (which can be found on my YouTube Channel) entitled Being the Beloved. In the sermon Nouwen dissects Matthew 4 where the Spirit leads Jesus into the desert to be tempted by Satan. Nouwen breaks down Jesus' three temptations into areas we can identify today. We can wrongly live with any (or all) of these three truths: I am what I do; I am what others think of me; I am what I have. In contrast to these false "scripts," Nouwen expands the Last Supper experience. He proposes that as God's Beloved, we are like the bread: Jesus takes the bread; Jesus blesses the bread; Jesus breaks the bread; Jesus gives the bread. This powerful analogy calls us to courageously own our brokenness, place it under the cross, and live under the blessing of being used by God despite our brokenness. In this way, our lives will bear much fruit.

As the teachers wrestled with the SJCS Throughlines, God's Spirit revealed a false script that I carry. That script says, "You are different and that is bad. When your gifts threaten others, hide them. You are not enjoyable." As the Spirit uncovered this script, waves of emotion swept through me. I felt shame, sadness, confession, connection, peace, and even delight in a matter of minutes.

Many of us have a similar "script" that Satan adeptly uses to keep us from God's good work. My middle school students are keenly aware of the scripts that shape them every minute of every day as they work hard to discover who they are, and who they want to be.

Indeed, in this small slice of my one story, God's faithfulness reigns. God's faithfulness whispers through the Holy Spirit. God's faithfulness shines in Jesus Christ. As we press forward in this journey of faith, let us take up our cross and respond in faithful service to our faithful God. Then you will know the Truth, and the Truth will set you free. John 8:32